Days fly so fast. It's Wednesday again and time for Couple's Corner meme. I'm not really very busy, I just have these KATAM mode so if you can recognize, my blog consists of only CC and nothing more. =) It's just that I love this meme much and I can't let Wednesday pass without writing about the week's topic.
This topic seems to be the hardest to write for me, so far. It's because we've been through a lot of misunderstandings and I can hardly remember which one was the 1st or the 2nd or the 3rd. Majority are really very petty though ;) There are actually a lot, but I believe those were brought about by immaturity and lack of trust. I was only 19 when we got married and he was 24. I might have been thinking maturely then, but not really matured enough to handle things right.
My hubbydubs is one quiet man. With my ex, I was like a noisy, uncontrollable, broken megaphone. =) Upon meeting Mark, it seems that I was transformed into someone I was impossible to become. I learned how to shut my mouth out. How can you shout at the person who is so quiet and seems so kind? LOL.. As much as I try to recall, I can't really remember what that first misunderstanding was. All I can remember is that there was one serious case then and I was really hurt and even talked to my Tita (who's my adviser) and told her that I'll be leaving Mark already and that I'm ready to start a new life only with Alyssa. I even asked if I made the wrong decision of marrying this man. Since he always keeps quiet, the best communication I thought then was text messaging. When he leaves home, that's the time I will send him messages regarding the things that are bothering me. Then, he will try to make things up by saying sorry. And that time, for me, sorry is not enough. I need an explanation and even an assurance. Then I remembered writing him a very long letter (damn! I can't remember where that letter is now..) and that was how we fixed things up.
We've been married for 4 years already and are planning to renew our vows on our 5th year. With all those misunderstandings, world wars, LQs and whatever you call it, there is only one thing I always keep and remember. It is an advice from my Tita who's been married for more than 15 years now and they still look like newly weds each and everyday. And here it goes, "IN MARRIAGE, PRIDE SHOULD ALWAYS BE SET ASIDE. MAKING THE FIRST MOVE TO PATCH THINGS UP SHOULDN'T ALWAYS COME FROM THE ONE WHO MADE THE MISTAKE, IT CAN COME FROM THE ONE WHO UNDERSTANDS"
5 comments:
Wow! you know..when I was reading your first few entries, I was always kilig to the bones, your story seemed to be always so loving and sweet, and as if, no sourness will happen. Until these last few topics that I came to know what you have gone through. Sabagay, wala namang relasyon na puro sweetness di ba? I never thought na sa bait ni Mark, you would've made plans on leaving him. I mean, sa mga kwento mo naman kasi, parang wala siyang ginagawang anything except yung ginigising siya ng girl sa umaga. So, parang it's so puzzling na iiwan mo siya..Hehehe..di ba kapag nagkwento ka na magbabalot ka na at isasama mo na ang anak mo to live away from him, para bang sobrang laki ng ginawang kasalanan sau..
Nakakatuwa ring isipin na sa dinami dami ng mga misunderstanding nyo, ayan at magkasama pa rin kau, masaya. Ganon yata kapag una pa lang eh, parang yung unang mga taon, parang di kayang itagpos di ba? As if, the first few years of marriage, yun yung pinakamahirap na stage. Mag te text kapag naka alis na si hubby? hehehe..bago yun ah..inisin ko nga rin si Rodney at saka ko i text, hehehe.
Tama ang advice ng Tita mo, di naman need na kung sino ang at fault lang ang mag sorry..pero alam mo, hindi kasi applicable yun sa akin eh, kung sino ang may kasalan, siya mag sorry..matigas pa naman ang loob ko..kahit ako nga ang may kasalanan, pinipilit kong siya, ahahaha! Great post.. Next week uli..
love the advice.. naku marami pang magdadaan. at tulad nga ng nabanggit ko dati un first 5 years daw talaga ang pinakamahirap na stage sa mag-asawa.. well at least si hubby mo nman at mabait at maunawain. and just as long isa sa inyo eh magbababa ng pride and isa eh makakaunawa tingin ko nman eh walng problemang di malulutas..
heres mine >> http://mydigihome.info/?p=271
Sa buhay ng pag-aasawa,di yata nawawalan ng misunderstanding--nasa atin na rin kung papaano natin mai-handle pagkatapos ng away.Mapait na masarap ang away kasi pagkatapos,parang on fire na naman kayo lol!!I love the photo that you posted--nice couple!!^_^
hehehh... those things makes relationship stronger or weaker... it always depends on handling those situations:)
Keep the love burning!
I can relate! There was one misunderstanding when we didn't talk to each other and it was only when he left for work that I texted him! I poured my heart out on those texts and I think it worked for me (or for us) that time because nakakapagod magtext kaya mejo pili un words na sasabihin so mejo hindi hurting un words di ba? We patched up things after that and talked about it when he got home. Mejo cool na siympre. :)
I really love reading your posts. I like what your Aunt told you. Ang ganda, I will always remember that whenever my hubby and I have misunderstandings! :) Thanks for sharing that. :)
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